A Tiny Home Creates a Safe Space for a Teenager

I was jolted awake by my cellphone's jingle just after midnight. A caseworker from the department of human services wanted to know some information about an incident that had occurred many years prior. It took me a few moments to grasp what she was saying.

After a groggy ten-minute conversation, I hung up bewildered. Four hours away from my escape to Washington for some much needed respite, our seventeen-year-old son was on his way home after an unexpected crisis in the wee hours of the night.

I could feel my body become tense. My mind raced. My heart pounded. How were we going to make this all work in the middle of the night? Our son didn't know that we were headed to the airport at four am, and his bedroom and bathroom were not options for multiple reasons, one of which was a remodel project.

Fortunately, a few months earlier we had built a tiny house out of an old pop up trailer. It had become our son's "safe space" when things got tough. He had a couch that turned into a bed, a fridge, a microwave, a sink, even a tub/shower hook up (not quite complete at this point). He had his guitar and a few food items and water bottles for when he just wanted to stop by.

My son and I had gotten to the place in our relationship where we triggered each other constantly, so we had come up with a plan. He would not be in the house unless my husband, his dad, was home. This worked well to reduce the number of crisis situations where emergency responders would have to come and deescalate the situation.

The idea to build the tiny home came after our son left the house of some relatives and entered a treatment program. We knew something needed to be different when he came back to our home five weeks later.

My husband was given an old pop up that he planned to convert into a boat trailer, which would have been a much easier project that what we decided to do. He reluctantly let go of his dream to transport his small boat, took a week of vacation time, and worked 8-10 hours a day for a week to build our son a shelter outside of our home.

I worked alongside him, overseeing the design and functionality of the space. We tried to make things as easy as possible on us by leaving existing plumbing and electrical in place. The unit came with a small tub/shower which we wanted to keep. It also included a hot water heater, gas line, fresh water tank and pump. The space had to be designed around all of them.

This was an exciting project for me. I dreamed of our son hanging out here listening to his music and chatting with friends on his phone. He could come and go as he pleased, and learn how to take care of his space. Perhaps managing something so small would be easier than tackling his bedroom or our shared kitchen space inside.

Under professional's advice, we came up with a contract for the tiny home. This way our son would know what was expected of him. We even gave him the option of earning or buying the unit and taking it with him when he turned eighteen. I thought it would be awesome to have a little space to call your own so early in life.

Our son had other ideas. And that's okay.

As parents we can dream big dreams for our kids, but our dreams don't always line up with theirs. This was the case with the tiny house. We poured our blood, sweat, and tears into a space that our son saw as a punishment more than he saw as an opportunity. I can't tell you how heartbreaking this was for us.

A year later, we are completing the final touches on this unique home so we can list it for sale. A fresh coat of white paint, trim around the windows, and new vinyl flooring make this tiny space glow. I'm so excited to decorate it and show it off to potential buyers. We video recorded most of the build, so eventually we may get it edited and up on YouTube for others to enjoy.

I remember one night when the police were at our home looking for our son. After interviewing us, one of the officers noticed the trailer/tiny home sitting in our side yard. He made a comment about it and my husband offered him a look inside. It was encouraging to know that other people thought our project was pretty cool.

I can't tell you how many times I've thought to myself, "I want this space for myself! It's so simple and relaxing."

Each family must come up with their own solutions when challenges arise. Running off to Washington was my way of activating an emotional reset button so I could be a better wife and mother. Building the tiny home was our way of creating a safe space for our son. Coming up with a creative answer to a problem may be just what your family needs right now.

Be encouraged by the words of Paul. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. - 2 Corinthians 4:17

Whatever situation you are facing today - it will not last forever. One day all our pain and suffering will be no more. One day our momentary troubles will be a distant memory. One day we will wake up in eternity and never look back.

May you be blessed by His presence as you seek Him for guidance today.